LUCKY ONES

There's a feeling you get when you're so ridiculously close to someone.
-Maybe it's when you spoon for too long, but it feels like you're so close to another independent being that you start to get in sync.
I swear- body temperatures feel like they cancel each other out & you reach equilibrium.
One moment you're both breathing hard, & the next you're holding him so close that you lose the sound of your heart beat under his.
It's impossible to write down the things that surface when you're that close to someone.
It's not even fair to try explain how he makes me feel.

I've never felt this before.
- That's what everyone says, but it's true.
I don't think I've ever felt more comfortable being vulnerable to another person.
I can't say that I'm not afraid- That would just be a bold face lie.
I can't say that I don't have my insecurities, because that's literally impossible.
But I feel more alive in a way.

I'm not sure how to word it, it's simple in my head but as soon as I try to match it with words it's too much, it's not enough.
I feel more real. I feel more emotional, I feel more aware.
The pain is more intense. Much more than anything else I've ever felt.
But the joy, & happiness, & satisfaction of being with someone so- real, so grounded & put together- it's indescribable.