Eye of The Tiger

    Today I came home and watched some of Rocky I and II. I spent most of the time thinking about yesterday and the events that took place, and pictured what they'd be like if I was older, and married to a heavy weight world champion. I wondered if I'd stand by in silence while my man beat himself up- like Adrian (his wife) does- or would I be in his face telling him him I loved him, and encouraging him to push harder and what not.

    Even as I'm writing this post listening to Beach House. I'm looking at my mini schnauzer, who seems to have such human characteristics in her behavior, and thinking about what it'll be like when I have real babies of my own. It sounds dumb and weird, but unlike other people's relationships with their pets, I often think about small gestures like petting and such with my puppy, and what they really mean. I wonder if she really knows that I love her. If she can sense how important she is to me even though she doesn't understand english. I can't help but think that now I sound like those crazy pet people that prefer to talk to animals as opposed to real humans. Which I assure you I most definitely am not, but you get the idea.

    And then on top of that, I'm currently wearing a boy's flannel shirt that he gave me only a few hours ago because he says it doesn't "fit him like it used to". Even though I made him try it on, and when it fit like a glove he simply said it just isn't the same and he'd much rather it be in my possession. It makes me laugh because I know he loves this shirt, and it's fits him just fine, but it's little things like giving your favorite flannel away that makes us stick out like a sore thumb that we're just overcome with love for someone.

    All of these small insignificant things have been pushing me into this world wind of what life will be like when I'm married and have my own family. I wonder if I'll be able to convince my husband I love him when he's at his lowest point. I wonder if my kids will know how much they mean to me. I wonder if my husband will let me borrow his favorite flannel when we're older and I'm cold. More than anything I just want to know that I'll be able to establish real love in my home.

    But back to the movie.. when Apollo is training Rocky to have his final fight, Rocky starts to lose his motivation and seems to give up completely in the middle of his training. Apollo then screams at him asking what the hell his problem is and why he's not trying anymore. Then he say's some thing great.

"See that look in their eyes, Rock? You gotta get that look back, Rock. Eye of the tiger, man."

    Now, I'm no philosopher on interpreting metaphors, but this just gives me chills. Weird connection I know, but I want to have the Eye of the Tiger. I don't want to have to say anything to let people know how I feel. I just want to have to look at them square in the eye for 2, 3 seconds tops, and they'll know what's up. My husband and children will only need to see my eyes to know I love them. Not that I wouldn't want to say it out loud, but we'll just have this connection where we can communicate without words. And it'll be just a meaningful.

    I know I think about future life more than normal people my age, but there is honestly nothing in this world that'd I'd want more than my own loving family. To be so sure of someone's love, and feel that constantly and equally with them I think is nothing short of the greatest thing on this planet. And then to be able to make life with that special person that literally serves as the prefect mixture of the two of you and watch that life grow. Freak. That's just amazing to me. I can't wait to be in love.

YO ADRIAN! I DID IT!